Feeling Cheap in A Modern World

How does a person bear witness to him or herself? In the modern world it is too easy to speak the language of Christianity and call it a day. Pope Francis reminds us Catholics that Catholicism - to be Catholic - is not simply to exist in an abstraction. It demands daily affirmation of our faith by actually living it on the ground. It is a faith of ordinary and banal actions among within the tedium of our daily lives. Against the temptations, misdirection and other pushes and pulls against us, we must take a stand

“one cannot bear witness without the presence of the Holy Spirit. In difficult moments, when we must choose the right path, when we must say ‘no' to many things that perhaps tempt and seduce us, there is the prayer to the Holy Spirit: it is he who strengthens us to follow along this path of witness”.

How does a Catholic act on the courage to convert? This is a question that cannot avoid the deep stuff

I have never felt more alienated than when I sat next to this person in a pew. It was in this space in which we presumably shared of our faith that I realized that we were not sharing in it. It was here that I was forced to confront that I lived I ""the holiness of daily life, every day holiness." In its place I was a sinner, one who called myself a Christian but live[d] as a pagan who believes in nothing[.]” The experience was repeated every time I attended mass, because Christ was (and is) not as easy on me as I was (and am) on myself.

It was despairing. It was to be in the presence of Truth and to have a sense or intimation that my answer in response to this Truth was a lie. It is that intimation in opposition to the Truth which is cheapness.

I was afraid to do little more than make trivial self-observations which I mockingly said to myself were critical self-examinations. How does a person bear witness to himself? How does a person respectably struggle to live while avoiding the temptation to merely observe one's self in order to collect the rewards of greater freedom through superior knowledge (and control)? To be a Christian is hard, but that is because it requires one to actively live the faith. It is easy enough to be aware of admit to one's sinfulness or flaws but that is not enough to live as a Christian, is it? That demands an active and affirmative answer to the call of the Truth of Christ over and over and over again...

There is a tendency among Catholics (at least ones with which I am familiar) to dwell on "modernity" -- I count myself as a big fan of such big thinking. But, the most important and interesting "Catholic Showdown Worth Watching" is likely your own.